A child of 45!

6 07 2017

That is what most of people and myself in primis think when getting to know me!

How could I disagree with that??

always all natural

  • all children almost at once like me: we think in the same way, of course!
  • I sleep on the floor: futon on a very rough handmade base
  • my room has no door, I live with 2 cats and 2 house mates
  • I work to maintain my “life hobby”, Aikido.. nah, let’s say it loud and clear: my life, Aikido!
  • my savings are not much more than … monthly balance.. no future planning (except for Aikido seminars), living the moment.. totally incapacity to answer the question: “what you want your life being in .. 5 years? 10 years? after retirement?”.. what life?
  • I have no girlfriend.. as a matter of fact I almost never had one
  • I got no children and already given up on any thought of a traditional family: enjoying every second with my closest friend children
  • I have never owned a car, a motorbike, a scooter, a dog or cat, never lived with a partner, never been married (reinforcement to my being weird concept)
  • I do not do very well with changes
  • fashion? Sorry, what’s that? I cannot dress properly, not like a 45 y/o man or not even as a 30 something y/o normal person.. I am still a jeans and T-shirt person (like the girls I usually like..). Next week I will go to a wedding in Italy and I am still unsure what I will wear, what I want to wear, where I can buy it, if what I have planned to wear will have the effect to be removed from all contact lists of the people attending the wedding, or just the will not open the door. I hope there is a children table!
  • I listen to more or less the same music I have been listening in the past 25 years
  • I fall asleep in front of the TV (PC) and then get up in the night to switch off the lights.. or I do it in the morning when I go to work!
  • I get grumpy fast like a little child not allowed to do what he wants, that very moment, but also I forget my anger equally fast, most of the times
  • I trust people, like a child.. I got burned quite a few times, but I keep trusting people.. maybe I am a stupid child, or just got a shorter memory than most.. or just I do not want to change (see above, not doing well with changes!)

My biggest fear is becoming a child of 50 that talks to himself (and even answers from time to time), unable to be socially acceptable in any ways (I mean, worse than now!) and being content about that or not even realizing it..

Being still a few years of neural degrading for reaching that point, I hope (at least!). I hope Aikido will help to keep some neurons alive!

And just for the final irony, I discovered today is world kissing day… ironic for a guy child, I mean, that has not kissed that much in his life (but enjoying it every time!) and probably has the record speed of being unmatched on Tinder..

..but at least tonight it is time again to fly to an Aikido seminar and especially to many friends I missed a lot lately.. and in particular celebrating 10 years of knowing a crazy fantastic person from Prague..

flying to…everywhere…





The return of a nightmare

22 05 2017

This morning, 4 am, I woke up, suddenly, in pain: the weight of the duvet on my right knee was enough to send jolts of pain through my nervous system.. and after a few hours, when it started swelling and the slightest touch was equivalent to deep pain, dark thoughts of “The Return of the Watermelon Knee” jumped in my mind and during the day the thoughts became unfortunately reality.

right knee swelling


Besides being in the Netherlands with almost no access to the Chinese products that cured me last time (yeah, no cure from what I got, RA is the only companion for life I will ever get), and not even the first round of pain killers that had proven very useful at the worst time of the swelling period, I have a very busy week in front of me preparing 3 even busier weeks when I will travel for work around Great Britain to give hands on training to different hospitals.. standing and talking activities.

I wish I could find a laowai friendly hospital that could prescribe me again the Tibetan herbal tablets I got then in China and used for a really long time. The only solution is scavenging among the bags of medicine I brought back from my short life in China and see what I manage to put together for a fast hopefully good effect.

leftovers of the magic Tibetan cure


I consider myself having a pretty high pain threshold but today I cried actually twice. I had forgotten the full inflammation pain and the return of it has been a quite traumatic awakening. 

In the next days I need to contain this pain and manage to control it. From next week I got pretty important work tasks that will require me standing most of the day when not walking pulling heavy cases. 

I wanted challenges right? Here they are… be careful what you wish for…

The first challenges were biking tobanf from work but especially walk three flights of stairs to get to my room at home. 

Habits are also painful. I always step into my hakama first with the left foot and I always mountvmy bike from the left side, therefore passing over the right leg… that is bending my swollen and inflamed right knee: the sudden sharp pain pain was definitively a good call to pay more attention!

my hakama

After the ice and evening rest I try to follow the other two rule of the recommended R.I.C.E. procedure: Rest – Ice – Compression – Elevation. 

knee elevation on the loft ceiling of my room


If I were a bat I’d probably be certainly better tomorrow… since I’m not I’m more curious about my weekend to come in Prague…





Ahhh Trondheim!

13 11 2016
winter is coming

warmth & memories

The warmth in my very cold room..

Trondheim, miss this home very often!!

norwegian sunset...

dramatic Norwegian sunset…





Sweet Monday!

31 10 2016

Monday can start in a completely different way when you got a colleague who is baking such great cakes!

sweet monday

peanut cheese cake





1 year anniversary 

25 10 2016

Exactly one year ago I moved to Amsterdam after about two years in Utrecht. 

last step of the move: my first beloved bike (stolen after less than 2 months 😭)


No regrets at all, I should have maybe done it before even!

Morning in Amsterdam

It helped that the company I work got also moved here but since I had already chosen the place for the love of my life, Aikido, I would have moved anyway… eventually… 

I’m just a tiny bit sad that friends who visited me when I was in Utrecht have not been back now that I moved. A few did come back, and saw I also managed to learn some of what this city can offer.. still hope someone else will also come back for a weekend of exploration of the beauty of Amsterdam. 





Unfit

13 10 2016

Last week I had to stop practice after the first hour and it was a bit annoying: I have a couple of physical problems that are carrying longer than expected, and a few too many thoughts on my mind, that are also not helping.

During a first hour of several beginner techniques, working especially on ikkyo and with no throws at all, I had to compensate a lot a problem with one knee that is forcing me to avoid as well all suwariwaza work. That is boring, but last year, more or less in the same period I had the same problem, that went away with some rest..

hope... for something better....

hope… for something better….

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Autumn colors

5 10 2016

Autumn colors..

..sometimes the way to work is not bad at all..